Thursday, April 01, 2004

Some Pithy Conjecture:

9/11 Commission Shocking Discovery…

Could 9/11 have been prevented? Is the Bush administration to blame for failing to stop the attacks? What about Clinton’s administration? The 9/11 commission, made up of former lawmakers, is trying desperately to answer these questions. The whole panel could save a lot of time by asking me. I know for a fact who’s to blame for 9/11: the Bin Laden administration. Shock and awe! Could 9/11 have been prevented? Yes. Clinton had a few chances to nab Bin Laden. During a business luncheon Clinton said, “"At the time, 1996, [Bin Laden] had committed no crime against America so I did not bring him here because we had no basis on which to hold him, though we knew he wanted to commit crimes against America.” Does this mean we should blame Clinton for 9/11? Absolutely not. There would be no logical basis for such blame. If a burglar breaks into your house and steals your dog are you to blame for not having better security? No, the criminal is to blame for breaking the law. Common sense at it’s finest.

WMD Worries

Recently, I visited my former high school to pick up my yearbook, and one of the more liberal teachers, with whom I debated the Iraq war at length, caught up with me. With an enormous grin on his face he said, “See, I told you so. No weapons of mass destruction.” I shook my head and with a sigh admitted “defeat.” Sure, we have yet to find WMDs, and I guess that was our top goal in Iraq. Since we haven’t found the weapons no one, not even the almighty U.N., disputed he possessed, I guess the rest of our mission was a failure as well. Liberation of an oppressed people: failure. Removing a ruthless dictator whose sons got their jollies via rape and torture: failure. Sending a message to other rouge countries, like Libya, about the consequences of not disarming: another failure if we don’t find those WMDs. I’m willing to admit defeat regarding the WMDs, and the entire war for that matter, if anyone opposing the war will answer yes to this question: If you could turn back the clock and stop the invasion—put Saddam back in power, rebuild the torture rooms, allow terrorists haven in Iraq, organize the secret police, etc.—would you? Before you answer, ask Guzin Najim, whose husband was killed by the elite guard, her opinion. I’m sure she’d be glad to share.

Dick Clarke’s American Blandstand

Dick Clarke, not of New Years Eve fame, is quite upset with the Bush administration. Clarke was the Special Adviser for Cyberspace Security within the National Security Council. He resigned after Bush chose Tom Ridge to head the new Department of Homeland Security instead of him. Now, seemingly upset about not getting the job, Clarke has decided to sling mud at the Bush administration. I think Ann Coulter sums up the situation best, “Are you sitting down? Another ex-government official who was fired or demoted by Bush has written a book that ... is critical of Bush!…As long as we're investigating everything, how about investigating why some loser no one has ever heard of is getting so much press coverage for yet another "tell-all" book attacking the Bush administration?” Read the rest of the article here.

Fort Knox Now Storing Gasoline

With the price of gasoline rising steadily and the war in Iraq still raging, I have to wonder, “Wasn’t this a war for oil?” I halfway expected to be paying ten cents a gallon by now! Either this war was about something other than oil (who knows what) or the American consumers are being seriously ripped off. Or both?

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